Last updated on April 4th, 2021 at 01:45 am
Part 3 of Niya’s 5-day guest post series! Enjoy!
Networks and the importance of mobilizing them.
This is and isn’t about marketing. Contradictory? Sure. Confusing? Hopefully not by the end of this post.
You started this exercise with the intention to have the sort of life where you can make extraordinary change, and that you can manage gracefully, and easily, without an assistant. You made a plan. You’re keeping your word to other people (and ideally to yourself). So now what?
Nothing that makes a serious impact happens in a vacuum (the science may be wrong, but the metaphor works for the moment). The best way to make real change, and to make it happen quickly and effectively, is to tell people about it. I don’t mean in an annoying sales pitch, marketing sort of way. I mean genuinely sharing opportunities, stories and information. Talk about what you’re up to, especially those impossible things you’ve committed to making real.
The best people to tell are the ones you know. I’ve tried it with strangers and the return on the investment of your time makes talking to your friends about the stuff you’re up to seem very attractive. Plus they’re your friends. They like you, and are generally interested in the things you’re doing…and if they’re really good friends, they’ll help.
This help is why mobilizing your networks is a crucial part of having this sort of life, and doing it without an assistant. You’ll get the help you need, from people who love you. This is extra important because sometimes you’ll make promises that you can’t quite keep. You’ve committed to keeping your word, and you’re aware of the impact it’ll have when you break it. So use that lifeline, phone a friend.
There are of course ways to do this gracefully.
Be upfront about the situation. If you don’t give them all the information, they’ll find out eventually and probably won’t like you nearly as much for not trusting them.
Ask for help, not for favours. Favours pile up and can lead to a lot of resentment down the road, especially if your friends are the sort who keep score. Also, they’re your friends, they aren’t going to judge you for needing help.
Don’t abuse the help, or the friendship—and know that you have to be willing to offer them the same in return.
Thank them properly. Appreciation, both immediate and over the long term means you’re more likely to get the help you need when you need it in the future.
So put that network to good use. Tell them what you’re up to. Tell them what you need to make those impossible-seeming things happen. If you don’t ask, you absolutely will not get anything. And if you do ask, the worst you’ll get is a negative response. You’ve got a healthy ego – you can deal with it. It’s not you they’re turning down—it’s what you’ve asked for when you’ve asked for it. So hop to it already! And come back, because there’s more on this next time!
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