Okay, that last post was true, but just filler.

Last updated on April 13th, 2021 at 10:22 pm

Guess who’s back. Back again.

So it’s been a couple days since my last life update—haven’t really had time to get on the computer. So what to say today? Hm… ah. I know.

First, let us do a Pro/Con comparison of recent events.

1)A girl hit on me at work.

  • PRO: She was hot to death, 26, and asked me for my number. Definite pro.

  • CON: She was a teef. I was thinking with the dick and not my head, so I didn’t really notice at the time that her ID was forged and I never really bothered to look at the credit card all that much. So I guess I pretty much gave away a cold G. Idiot—I’m not making that mistake again anytime soon.

2)I haven’t been fighting with anyone lately.

  • PRO: Yup. Things’ve been pretty quiet. No online fights, no fights with the fam, all is still.

  • CON: I don’t fight because I don’t care. My compassion for the world has reached an all-time low, and I’m surprised that I curbed my suicidal tendencies years ago and that they haven’t resurfaced. *shrug* Oh well, it’s all for the better, right? (*crickets chirp all around him*)

Anyway, those are the two most recent. I also randomly met this guy on the bus last night, I don’t even know how we started talking. But he’s pretty cool, and him and I share some common interests and stuff, so that’s cool. At least there’s someone else to chat with.

*nod* No I’m not gay.

Next point: my man digi_tek suggested that the causation of me feeling like crap and whatnot and the emptiness I feel inside may be due to the lack of religion in my life. This is the perfect opportunity to present:


1) I believe in a higher power, but am reluctant to give it a name.

In my opinion, if I latch myself onto a specific religion, that I am shutting out the beliefs of all other possible religions. And that just ain’t right. What makes Christianity more valid than Hinduism. Or Buddhism better than Zionism. And yes, this one might be a stretch to the closed-minded, but what’s so wrong with Satanism? All I’m saying is that I abide more by spiritualism than religion, and my spirituality takes different elements from several religions, which I think makes it valid in itself.

2)People create the presence of deities in their minds to detract from their realities.

Alright, I also believe that the human race believes in higher powers that may or may not exist for several reasons:

  1. The constant belief that no matter what they do in life, if they try and pull a 180-degree turn, they will be able to absolve themselves of all their sins and make it into a happy afterlife
  2. They believe in religion when there’s nothing/no one else to believe in
  3. Many, after placing all their faith in religion, are blinded by it, not being able to see life for what it is, not able to see plain fact, or even worse, they try to force it upon others! It’s worse than drugs at times!
  4. I don’t find the Bible… accurate. Granted, the entire Revelations chapter does share some interesting aspects with reality, but my view upon the structure of time (which would take hella long to explain and justify), there would be a greater chance of the Big Bang happening (which I also believe is a stupid theory) than Adam and Eve
  5. If God kicked Satan out from Heaven, how come Satan has a stronger influence on Earth if he didn’t have more power than God to keep himself in Heaven?
  6. Ok, toughie. Now, if God = Jesus = The Holy Ghost, yet Mary had Jesus by immaculate conception through God… then God gave birth to Himself… which is impossible because He was still in Heaven and… etc etc…
  7. If God created all life, who created God?
  8. Bonus Question: Now God created Man in the image of Himself. But… he created Jesus in the image of Himself. And… if they’re both in the image of Himself, then Jesus = Man. But wait… if Jesus = God… then since Man = Jesus, Man = God… whoa. Well, that’s not good, now is it?

Okay, well you get the point. Anyway, I’m boring myself with this entry now, so I’ll stop before someone’s eyes start to bleed. Anyway, I’m a bit more cheerful after writing that out (and after eating some of mama’s good ol’ home cookin’), so I’m gonna jet and finish this essay on hip-hop’s effects on children and junk. Peace y’all.

See you when I look at you,

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Allow Me to Reintroduce Myself.

Last updated on May 4th, 2021 at 02:14 am

What’s the condensed version of my life story?

Well. Let’s start with some simple statistics, shall we?

Name: Only known to a selected few (and it’s best that you never knew)
DOB: July 15, 1983
Birthplace: Mississauga, Ontario, Canada
Residence: Mississauga, Ontario, Canada
Background: Jamaican

Alright, so I was born to a pair of Jamaican parents, who were reasonably strict in raising their first child. Yeah, that would be me. The memories of my childhood are few and far apart, and I don’t know whether this is because they lacked importance or if I have simply blocked them out. I come from your average middle-class family. Parents still together after 20 years of marriage, two younger brothers, altogether I suppose it’s a pretty drama-free domicile.

So the question is: “What’s wrong with me?”

Things That Are Potentially Wrong with Casey Palmer.

Ever since… maybe puberty? I’ve always felt out of place, like either there was something missing in my life, or I’m just not in the right place… the right planet. I even went through bouts of extreme depression and defeatism for a long time. But I’ve been told that it doesn’t make sense as I come from a very privileged life. Excuse me if my rambling begins to go all over the place. That’s the way I am sometimes—just random as hell.

So sometimes I feel like I’m an alien. Sometimes I can be all bubbly, and other times I’ll look like I’m ready to commit genocide. I don’t think there are times where I’ve smiled for more than five seconds at a time.

I’ve always experimented with a number of different hobbies to try and discover how I best express myself. I’ve tried drawing. Writing. Poetry. Website Development. Volunteering. Student Government. There’s been so much I’ve tried that I’m sure I’m missing stuff.

I’ve been so busy trying to discover that having fun is now a concept that’s fairly alien to me. I don’t drink or smoke, those things just don’t seem to appeal to me for some reason, and when I see other people getting their rocks off of it, it just kinda makes me wish that I had taken a different path in life so that I could enjoy life. Like a normal kid and not some child prodigy.

But then I realize, “Nah, I’m a smart kid. I’m not ugly. I’m athletic. I have a good personality,” and dismiss those thoughts. Well, not totally, but I get to thinking about other things.

Anyway, that’s me. The kid who has multiple personalities (I’ll get into that later), but yearns to be someone else. I’m boring myself right now, so another instalment will come later.

In conclusion, I don’t know who I am or what I stand for. I guess that’s what life is all about. Finding these things out.

Anyway, I’m gonna go enjoy my day or something.


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Some Feelings on Fatigue

Last updated on April 13th, 2021 at 10:21 pm

Today, I’d like to address a serious issue that I think affects us all—fatigue.

That’s right, laugh if you will, but think about it. How many times have you declined to go somewhere with friends because “you’re too tired”? Or how many times have you planned to do something one night, but end up working a long shift of work and decide to crash instead? I believe that it’s an occurrence that happens too often… but life is tiring.

With the expectations for the modern human, especially the younger generation—we are the future, after all—it gets increasingly difficult to get anything done that’s worthwhile. The pressures drive us to sleepiness, and sometimes even insanity.

School + Extracurriculars + Work = How Do You Do It All?

How can one expect a high school student to maintain a high average, participate in community service, extracurriculars, and act as the Co-President of a Student Government while still eating healthy and attaining eight hours of sleep a night?! Bloody impossible I say.

Now, I know that education is necessary, but let’s get some things straight. When I entered my last blog all the way back in July, I was naïve in some ways, going into my final year of high school as the Co-President of my Student Government, flags waving, all amped up and ready to tackle a slew of challenges that would be presented before me. But now, after all the administration, complaining, whining, and 14-18-year-olds acting like they’re ten years younger than they are, it’s driving me to a breaking point.

But anyway—it’s 1:37 am for me right now, and I have things to do before returning to school tomorrow from the break. So, you’ll hear more from me shortly—I think I’m back in the weblog business!

Goodnight, and safe lives.

The second logo for Casey Palmer, Canadian Dad

What Does it Matter?

Last updated on March 16th, 2021 at 10:52 pm

Well. Let’s start this off straightforward. So that my friends don’t get confused, here’s who I am in the “real world”:

  • 5’7½”
  • 140 lbs
  • brown eyes, black hair
  • male
  • student
  • pigment-enriched
  • egotistically intelligent

You should be able to figure out who this is by that if you don’t already know. Now, who’s writing this weblog? Ha! Not the guy above! Kasikus Prime is a little more like the following:

  • 6’2″
  • 225 lbs
  • ochre eyes, black hair
  • male
  • general of the thought police
  • pigment-enriched
  • egotistically intelligent (and rightfully so)

Do you see the difference? Does it make a difference? Some of you may know who I truly am. Does that affect your judgement when you read this blog? Does it make you doubt it or believe it more than you normally would? Do I scare you or enlighten you? Does it make a difference? And if you don’t know me, I may as well be tall, short, skinny, fat, black, white, yellow, brown, red, purple, green, or candy-striped pink with a side of olives. Does it matter? As long as you’ve started to read this blog and keep reading, I guess it doesn’t matter to you, does it? So, I guess the true topic for today’s weblog is:

“What does it matter?”

In society today, our children are born to believe that life exists under a certain set of rules, regulations, beliefs, and values. These are fastened in place by a series of cornerstones, which we call education, religion, government, and law. But what’s the one thing that is powerful enough and has such a high potential to corrupt and blemish that all these cornerstones must rely upon it to function?

Money. Money corrupts worse than power. Power corrupts. Absolute power corrupts absolutely. Money created the sinner. Trade was the first type of money, and trade was what bred greed. For those who are Christian, this is best represented through Eve, who was offered happiness in exchange for the consumption of a forbidden apple. Greed. If that apple had not been eaten by Eve, would things be the way they are today? Most likely. If Eve hadn’t done it, then someone else would have. It’s human nature. Whoever made the human wasn’t paying much attention to the fine-tuning. I think that human nature is best put into perspective by Calvin of Bill Watterson’s Calvin and Hobbes:

“I think the surest sign that other intelligent life exists is the fact that it hasn’t tried to contact us.”

— Calvin

Answer: It Depends.

So does anything matter really? No—well, I suppose in some ways. It depends. You can either master your money or let the money master you. Shall I explain the difference? Those who let themselves be ruled by the money are those who think of only themselves, by shopping incredulously and spending frivolous amounts of money upon themselves. I, too, was victim to this disease for some time.

But then there are those who are the masters of their money. They invest. And when I say invest, I do not refer simply to banking or to the stock market. If one has enough money, and they are the master of their money, you will see them investing money in the community, investing money in the less fortunate, investing money in the world’s future. We need more money-masters than money-slaves, but with our mind-embedded mentalities of how we think life should be, I don’t think that’s going to happen anytime soon.

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Who Am I? What Am I?

Last updated on March 31st, 2021 at 09:32 pm

Estimated reading time: 2 minutes

Let’s start with a set of questions: “Who Am I? What Am I?”

Mineral, animal, vegetable. A human can be any of these. As a vegetable, you could be wasting your time watching television or possibly sitting down somewhere reading a smutty magazine fantasizing over something you could never have. As an animal, you act upon emotion and instinct, going boldly forth into the world, acting upon whatever you come across. But as a mineral, you act as a necessary building block for the world around you. Your absence would bring chaos and a weakening of the structure. You are essential. I’d like to be a mineral.

Literally, we’re seen to be an animal. But the literate is in the eye of the beholder. Many would say that the literal is defined only by what is socially acceptable. The kind of knowledge you’d find in an a encyclopedia or a dictionary. But I beg to differ. This viewpoint is what would make one close-minded. A tool of the environment surrounding them.

Rather than be a tool, I think I’d prefer to be the wielder of the tool. I’d prefer to mould the world that’s around me for its own bettering—of course, this may prove to be yet another egotistical foray into the world, but who am I to judge my own actions? I am a mineral. In “literal” terms, the mineral is not conscious of its actions but only acts to perform its function as a building block of its environment.

But this isn’t literal. This is me. My thoughts. My ideas. And my mind.

This mineral’s out to change the world. Watch your step.

The second logo for Casey Palmer, Canadian Dad