Have we forgotten about manners? Are the lessons that society has taught us throughout our lives about conduct and behaviour being trod on and thrown out the window? It’s not such a nice world out there. We flip the bird to fellow drivers and beak off to figures of authority. We write nasty comments on blogs and refuse to get along.
It’s a dog-eat-dog world out there.
I was reminded of this at a party I threw earlier this summer. RSVPs are a wonderful thing: they help us figure out how many people to prepare for at a party; when done online, they help people to get excited for a party where they can reconnect with others that they haven’t seen in a while; above all, they help set the tone for the kind of party that people can expect.
But there’s two key scenarios where RSVPs break down:
1: When people don’t bother to answer
This isn’t too bad — sometimes people will be too busy (or too LAZY) to answer, yet show up to your party anyway. It might be annoying when you don’t have enough food and drink to go around, or when they come empty-handed expected to raid your fridge, but it IS a warm body to fill up what could otherwise be a pretty empty and pretty lame party.
2a: When people say they’re going to come and don’t
This can get a little annoying for similar reasons to 1 (but of course, opposite, since now you’ll have TOO MUCH food and drink), but not NEARLY as bad as
2b: When people say they’re going to come and don’t AND don’t bother to TELL you
This? This just takes the cake. DON’T DO IT. Not only do you mess up the party by not being there; not ONLY do you fill up spots unnecessarily if it’s a fixed-capacity function… in general, you just wind up being a JERK.
So that’s my rant and moral for the day — if you’re invited to a party, as a best case scenario, RESPOND! Even if you have to say no, at least the organizer will know what’s up! And if you don’t know whether or not you can make it, don’t reply. Or if it’s a last-minute change, drop them a line to let them know! But don’t just say you will then NOT DO IT. That’s wack. And really, you don’t wanna be that guy (or girl) — those are the ones who’re just the least likely to get invited back.
–Casey E. Palmer